Thursday, October 31, 2013

2325 - Halloween jokes

Did you have to tell a joke to get candy on Halloween like I did? If you're going out tonight and need some ammunition here are some kid safe Halloween jokes.



What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman? Frostbite.

What do you get when you cross a werewolf and a vampire? A fur coat that fangs around your neck.

What does a vampire never order at a restaurant? A stake sandwich.

What do you call a witch in the desert? A sandwitch.

What does a vampire fear the most? Tooth decay.

Where did the vampire open his savings account? At a blood bank.

Who do vampires buy their cookies from?  The Ghoul Scouts

What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost? Bamboo.

What do you call a fat Jack-O-Lantern? A plumpkin.

What do you call a ghost with a broken leg? A hoblin goblin.

Why wasn't there any food left after the monster party? Because everyone was a goblin!

What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? Spare ribs.

Why don't skeletons like parties? They have no body to dance with.

Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? Their bats flew away.

How does a witch tell time?  She looks at her witch watch.

What was the witch's favorite subject in school? Spelling.

What's the problem with twin witches?  You never know which witch is which.

What do ghosts serve for dessert? Ice Scream.

What is a vampire's favorite holiday? Fangsgiving.

What is a vampire's favorite sport? Casketball.

What kind of streets do zombies like the best? Dead ends.

Who did Frankenstein take to the prom? His ghoul friend.

Why did the skeleton cross the road? To go to the body shop.


5 comments:

Bilbo said...

Har, de har-har-har!! Good jokes for me to tell my grandchildren so they'll roll their eyes and tell me how stupid my jokes are.

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

Cute!
I'm in mourning today. Damn Cardinals!!!

eViL pOp TaRt said...

Hey, those were funny!

Duckbutt said...

Okay, you tricked us!

Elvis Wearing a Bra on His Head said...

No, Mike treated us!