Sunday, December 13, 2020

4995 - Long joke Sunday


A poor family lives on a farm and they rely on their chickens for income. One morning, the father walks outside to find the chicken coop empty and the corpses of chickens on the ground.

"There’s nothing that could help get us out of poverty now," says the dad and he shoots himself. 

The mom walks outside and sees the dad and the chickens on the ground. "I can't live without my husband," she says and she shoots herself with her husband's gun. 

The daughter walks outside and sees her mother, father, and the dead chickens. "I can't live any longer without my family," she says and she jumps into the river and kills herself. 

The oldest son, 23 years old, walks outside looking for the family and sees them all dead. "Is there any way to bring them back?" he yells at the sky. 

Poof! A magical fairy appears out of thin air. "I will bring your whole family back to life, even the chickens," she says, "if you can screw me 5 times in a row. If not, I get to kill you." 

The boy screws her 2 times in a row and can't do it anymore, he dies. 

The middle son, 19 years old, comes out and sees the fairy. She gives him the same offer as his brother. "I will bring your whole family back to life, even the chickens," she says, "if you can screw me 5 times in a row. If not, I get to kill you." 

The son agrees to do it but can only do it 4 times. He dies. 

The youngest son, 15 years old, comes out and is given the same offer." I will bring your whole family back to life, even the chickens," she says, "if you can screw me 5 times in a row. If not I get to kill you." 

The son says, "What if I screw you 10 times in a row?" 

The fairy thinks. She says, "I will bring back your family and grant you fortune. 

The son says, "What if I screw you 20 times in a row?" 

She thinks again and says, "I will bring back your family, grant you fortune, and give you a mansion." 

The son thinks and says, "What if I screw you 30 times in a row?" 

She thinks and says, "I will bring back your family and ensure that your family bloodline remains rich for the next 10 generations to come." 

The son says, "Wait! How do I know YOU'LL survive?"

"What do you mean?" says the fairy.

The 15 yo son says, "The chickens didn't."


11 comments:

John A Hill said...

Oh that is bad!

Elephant's Child said...

He had better be gentle with her - if he wants his wishes fulfilled.

Mike said...

JH - It was sure a waste of a lot of chickens. Unless she can hang in there.

EC - Hopefully she's bigger than a chicken.

Bilbo said...

I didn't see that one coming. You're getting better at this.

Mike said...

B - Practice practice practice.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Oh, that's so bad! I almost feel guilty for laughing at the punchline!

Mike said...

DSWS - But not quite, right?

Cloudia said...

And full circle!

Mike said...

C - I'm worried about what's going to happen when all those chickens come back to life. The circle starts all over?

Martha said...

Oh, nasty! But I laughed :)

Mike said...

M - You have to keep an eye on the 15yo boys.