5388 - Long joke Sunday

Two trucker stories.

As a trucker stops for a red light, a blonde catches up. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his truck, and knocks on the door. 

The trucker lowers the window, and she says, "Hi, my name is Heather and you are losing some of your load." The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street. 

When the truck stops for another red light, the girl catches up again. She jumps out of her car, runs up, and knocks on the door. Again, the trucker lowers the window. 

As if they've never spoken, the blonde says brightly, "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!" Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and continues down the street. 

At the third red light, the same thing happens again. All out of breath, the blonde gets out of her car, runs up, knocks on the truck door. The trucker rolls down the window. 

Again she says, "Hi, my name is Heather, and you are losing some of your load!" When the light turns green, the trucker revs up and races to the next light. 

When he stops this time, he hurriedly gets out of the truck and runs back to the blonde. He knocks on her window, and after she lowers it, he says, "Hi, my name is Ted. It's winter in Chicago, and I'm driving the salt truck."

A trucker came into a Truck Stop Café and placed his order with the waitress. He said, "I want three flat tires, a pair of headlights, and a pair of running boards."

The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, "This guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a pair of headlights, and a pair of running boards. What does he think this place is, an auto parts store?"

"No," the cook said,  "''Three flat tires' mean three pancakes, 'a pair of headlights' are two eggs sunny side up, and 'a pair of running boards' are 2 slices of crisp bacon!"

"Oh, OK!" said the blonde. She thought about it for a moment and then spooned up a bowl of beans and gave it to the customer.

The trucker asked, "What are the beans for, Blondie?"

She replied, "I thought while you were waiting for the flat tires, headlights, and running boards, you might as well gas up!"