My ex-wife texted me, "Wish you were here".
She does that every time she walks through a cemetery.
I found an old book...
Making marriage work by Henry VIII.
Best relationship advice...
Make sure you're the crazy one.
Looking into essential oils.
Which one is it that calms people down?
Chloroform?
It's chloroform, isn't it!
Ever wonder why farts stink?
It's so deaf people can enjoy them too.
Theiyr're...
Take that grammar police!
Every time I see a crackhead on a bike, I yell, "HEY! That's my bike."
Just to see how fast they can pedal.
Everything's a dildo if you're brave enough.
What's the difference between Iron Man and Aluminum Man?
Iron Man stops bad guys.
Aluminum Man just foils their plans.
Men, don't try and understand women.
Women understand women and they hate each other.
Online question...
If the earth is flat do the moon and all other planets are flat?
Ans 1: No, they doesn't.
Ans 2: Let me get this straight, aren't them wasn't?
Santa is a quantum being. His probabilistic nature means he can be in every house at the same time on Christmas. This is why it's vitally important no one sees him. If he's onserved the probabilities collapse and only one house gets presents.
Boebert is switching districts to improve her chances of staying in Congress.
I guess she rubbed her district the wrong way.
Rearranged letters...
DORMITORY
DIRTY ROOM
PRESBYTERIAN
BEST IN PRAYER
ASTRONOMER
MOON STARER
DESPERATION
A ROPE ENDS IT
THE EYES
THEY SEE
GEORGE BUSH
HE BUGS GORE
THE MORSE CODE
HERE COME DOTS
SLOT MACHINES
CASH LOST IN ME
ANIMOSITY
IS NO AMITY
ELECTION RESULTS
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT
SNOOZE ALARMS
ALAS! NO MORE Z'S
A DECIMAL POINT
I'M A DOT IN PLACE
ELEVEN PLUS TWO
TWELVE PLUS ONE
MOTHER-IN-LAW
WOMAN HITLER
A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
When someone invites me to their home and I see more than three cars parked outside, I keep driving, just in case it's an intervention.
Posts
11 comments:
Boebert better lay off the Beetlejuice.
I hope Boebert's new district doesn't like her any more than the old one.
Love those rearranged letters.
"Make sure you're the crazy one." Done.
Iron Man vs Aluminum Man -- GROAN!
Boebert doesn't even live in that district and there are lots of Republicans running for that seat, so she is hardly a shoe-in.
Kirk - SOme Republicans are having a contest to see how crazy they can act before they get kicked out of Congress. So far, 'whatever his name is' has won.
Sue - Coming up with rearranged letters takes a different brain function that I don't have.
Bill - Be on the lookout for interventions.
Deb - I know. Great one wasn't it? 😜
Lady - Maybe we should all sign up in that district and make the list so long no one will ever figure it out.
Too many good ones to pick out a favorite this week.
Kathy - That's a good thing.
Chuckles throughout!
MOTHER-IN-LAW
WOMAN HITLER!
Fun word plays
I like the rearranged letters and the Iron Man vs Aluminium Man
Cloudia - Not quite true for me, but...
River - It's like I told Sue, Coming up with rearranged letters takes a different brain function that I don't have.
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