6627 - Long joke Sunday

Today’s “Microsoft” Call of the Day…

I had a lovely phone conversation today with a very polite young chap who said he was calling from Microsoft.

“Hello, sir, how are you doing today?”

“I’m very well, thank you for asking. And how are you? More importantly… WHO are you?”

“Sir, my name is Gupta, and I’m calling from Microsoft.”

“Microsoft, eh? Is that a city in India somewhere? How’s the weather today — hot, or is it monsoon season? I’ve seen those National Geographic documentaries… that’s some serious rain!” 

“No, sir, the weather is very good. I am calling from MICROSOFT — the computer company — Mr. Bill Gates’ company. We have found a serious problem with your computer…”

“REALLY? My computer? Well, that’s very worrying…” 

“Yes, sir, it could become catastrophic for your files, your passwords, even your internet banking! But don’t worry — I can fix it for you…”

“No,” I interrupted, “it’s worrying because… I don’t actually HAVE a computer.”

Silence.

“You don’t, sir?”

“I don’t, Gupta. No computer.”

“Ahhh… then it must be your laptop.”

“Gupta.”

“Yes, sir?”

“I don’t have one.”

“An iPad?”

“Nope.”

“A tablet?”

“Nope. None of those.”

Pause.

“As a matter of fact, Gupta… I don’t even have a telephone.”

A few seconds of tense silence.

Then he says,

“Ah, sir… now you are lying to me!”

I replied,

“Well… you started it!” 

And I hung up.