Thursday, May 20, 2010

1152 - Couple 'uh jokes

I KNOW TYPING IN CAPS IS LIKE HOLLERING. BUT THAT'S HOW THIS JOKE CAME AND I'M NOT RETYPING IT!!!!


AFTER BEING MARRIED FOR 44 YEARS, I TOOK A CAREFUL LOOK AT MY WIFE ONE DAY AND SAID, "Darling, 44 YEARS AGO WE HAD A CHEAP APARTMENT, A CHEAP CAR, SLEPT ON A SOFA BED AND WATCHED A 10-INCH BLACK AND WHITE TV, BUT I GOT TO SLEEP EVERY NIGHT WITH A HOT 25-YEAR-OLD GIRL. NOW I HAVE A $750,000.00 HOME, A $45,000.00 CAR, NICE BIG BED AND PLASMA SCREEN TV, BUT I'M SLEEPING WITH A 65-YEAR-OLD WOMAN. IT SEEMS TO ME THAT YOU'RE NOT HOLDING UP YOUR SIDE OF THINGS."

MY WIFE IS A VERY REASONABLE WOMAN. SHE TOLD ME TO GO OUT AND FIND A HOT 25-YEAR-OLD GAL, AND SHE WOULD MAKE SURE THAT I WOULD ONCE AGAIN BE LIVING IN A CHEAP APARTMENT, DRIVING A CHEAP CAR, SLEEPING ON A SOFA BED AND WATCHING A 10-INCH BLACK AND WHITE TV.


In this next joke they only holler on the LAST LINE.


A man boarded a plane with six kids. After they got settled in their seats a woman sitting across the aisle from him leaned over to him and asked, "Are all of those kids yours?"

He replied, "No. I work for a condom company. These are customer complaints."

I WISH I COULD THINK THAT QUICKLY!


 

6 comments:

Amanda said...

Ha! Ha! Ha!

Bandit said...

Good one's!

Bilbo said...

Loved the "customer complaints."

vw: aftlefer - the lefer in the back of the boat.

Candice said...

I liked these. Especially the second one. :)

Claudia said...

You could segway from the second one into another which has the punchline, "Why do you ask, Broken Rubber?"

Mike said...

A - I agree

B - I know you agree.

B - Nothing like a little sarcasim.

C - I knew the girls would like these.

C - That's a real long Indian joke to get to that punch line.


If one more 'C' person had commented I could have had ABBCCC.