1650 - Bacon... no not Kevin

From the editorial page of my local newspaper...


This page has a proud pro-bacon tradition. Whether it's the sizzling, the cholesterol, the ability of bacon to bring out the flavor in everything from cheeseburgers to chocolate, we can't get enough of the stuff.

So while we don't condone what Damon L. Petty is alleged to have done, we can understand the urge.

Mr. Petty was found Tuesday morning in a University City home that didn't belong to him. He was stealing things, the cops say, but he stayed behind to fry up a pan of bacon. That's what he is alleged to have been doing when Kenya Ealy came home. She and a friend restrained him until police arrived.

A yearning for bacon was his downfall.

It is a good thing for society that many would-be criminals are desperately stupid. There's even a cable TV show that sometimes features the "World's Dumbest Outlaws." But we can understand being distracted by a package of bacon.

Especially if it was the applewood-smoked, thick-cut variety. Yum.

Here's the solution to the St. Louis Workhouse's problems in keeping inmates from escaping. Who's going to leave when the bacon's on the stove?


All I can say is .......
BAAACCCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNN!!!!!