1862 - It's late

Well it's late. Who can I steal ..... borrow something from tonight? JOHN!!!! He found an article about a guy carring an extra 100 pounds around with him. But the standard weight loss programs won't work for him.



OK here's how I would make extra money if I were him. Set up a booth and ask girls if they want to have a sit and then talk for a few minutes. Cost - ten cents a pound. Pictures extra.


OK it WAS late. I think it was Jay that I got this from.
 

1849 - Not covered

That's right homeowner, you're not covered. Why? Because you don't have 'animal intrusion insurance'. What? Animal what?

Well here's the story.

 

1846 - N*****r

Andrea found this. I thought I'd pass it along.


It was close but revealing nonetheless. On Wednesday, during a campaign stop in Janesville, Wisconsin, Rick Santorum spoke to a crowd and nearly called President Obama a ‘n****r’ before stopping himself in the middle of the word.

Santorum: “We know the candidate Barack Obama, what he was like, the anti-war government nigg… America was a source for division around the world, that what we were doing was wrong.”



Did Santorum almost call President Obama the N-word? It certainly sounds like it. Like many conservatives around the country, Santorum has displayed a tendency to inject racism into his rhetoric. Newt Gingrich has called President Obama the “food stamp President.” Santorum once said he didn’t want to make black people’s lives better. Rush Limbaugh has referred to the President as “Barack the magic Negro.” And conservatives have made efforts to pass birther bills all as a response to the color of our President’s skin. Though Santorum managed to stop himself, the damage has already been done. For any Presidential candidate to even come close to using such a word on the national stage is unacceptable. It not only reveals the rampant racism and feelings of white supremacy residing in Santorum’s twisted soul, it reveals the rampant racism and white supremacy feelings that have taken over the Republican Party.

 

1845 - Lottery 2

April fools. Here's a lottery story going around the internet right now.

Lottery winner comes forward.

It's a convincing story until you realize what day it is.

 

1843 - Two things

I was hearing crazy things yesterday.


I was talking to someone about general junk when he poppped up with, "You know that Tryvon Martin probably deserved to get shot". I think (WHAT?!) I let him rant on for a little bit and quickly changed the subject. I could see where there was going to be no changing of any minds.


Talking with friends about health care when one says, "People with preexisting conditions should pay more in health care". WHAT! What's the point of insurance? Especially health insurance. It's one thing if your car insurance goes up because you're a bad driver. But your health insurance goes up because you have bad genes?

And if you think about it every condition is preexisting. If you go to the doctor with a cold you've probably had the bug for a few days already. So PAY UP you genetic freak! Your body should have killed that germ already. We're not paying because ...... WE DON'T WANT TO.

 

1830 - Psychobull

Go ahead. Invest your money on Wall Street.

From the Huffington Post - One Out Of Every Ten Wall Street Employees Is A Psychopath, Say Researchers

Some psychologists have long claimed that the qualities that make for a high-achieving politician or stockbroker are also the same traits that psychopaths have in abundance.

This bullshits' for you. It makes the shamrocks grow.


That's right. You could be turning your money over to a psychopath. Or your financial advisor is dealing with a company that's full of them. What the hell. It's only money. Right?

 

1828 - No really, it was my personal ticket.

Headline -

Mega Millions winner must share with co-workers

That's right. A jury says pay up. Seems that this guy would buy lottery tickets for a group at work. Then he would buy his own tickets. "He says" that it was one of his own tickets that won the lottery. His coworkers were sceptical. So they did what any group of red blooded Americans would do, they sued.

And did you also know that Texas probably took 11 billion out of the education fund and put it in the general fund? At least that's what Missouri does.


Now here's the problem with me telling everyone this. There was not much information in the news story. And it's not worth researching much more because the lesson has been learned, for both sides - Make copies of the group tickets and hand them out to the group.

I did this at work. A long time ago. I would buy group tickets. But I would always head straight to the copy machine and zip out a copy for everyone. I would also write all the names in that particular group on the copy because the group makeup would change from week to week.

By doing it that way all the tickets got checked 10 times over and all the people in the group got the fun of checking a whole bunch of tickets. (Mainly because that's ALL the fun you're going to have buying lottery tickets.)

Buy lottery tickets for fun. You know, so you can tell your friends that you'll never see them again if you win.

 

1826 - Persistence

Persistence in what? Facts that are no longer facts.

I just got an email bashing Congress. (so far so good) It was about the presidential dollar program where a dollar coin was being minted for each dead president. The program was scheduled to go until 2016. The problem? Nobody was using the coins so they were all being put into storage.

They cost $.32 apiece to make. The mint was spending $560,000 a day making the coins. ABC did a news release on it. The news release got put in an email. I just got the email. The problem? The program has been CANCELLED! In 2008!

That's right, Congress got something right and cancelled a bad program. No REALLY!!! But the email is still floating around pissing people off that don't bother to check it out. Go figure!!

 

1807 - Pick one

Small cars, twitches, or crazy people? Let's go with crazy people.

Claudia sent me an email about a Christian Pastor that might be executed in Iran. Here's something from an article from last August.

Religious freedom advocates rallied Wednesday (Sept. 28) around an Iranian pastor who is facing execution because he has refused to recant his Christian faith in the overwhelmingly Muslim country.

OK, so things didn't look good back then. But what's been happening since? Here's part of a new article that confusses the situation a little bit.

Muslim cleric imitates Carnac the Magnificent and trys to guess what's on the other side of the piece of paper.


Youcef Nadarkhani, an Iranian pastor who in 2010 was found guilty of apostasy and sentenced to death for refusing to recant Christianity, may have received a final execution order, according to the American Center for Law and Justice and Fox News.

Neither Human Rights Watch nor Amnesty International could verify the information for The Huffington Post, but the White House on Thursday afternoon issued a statement condemning the reports and calling on Iran to release Pastor Nadarkhani.

So this information generated an email telling everyone to pray for the Pastor. That's fine. Everyone should. BUT! Someone else had to throw in their two cents worth when forwarding the email.

This will be happening here soon if "In Obama We Trust" isn't stopped and America gets back to "In God We Trust".

Really? Stop Obama or muslims will be executing pastors in America? Really? How about a one way ticket to Iran for this idiot so he can complain in person?

 

1797 - Privacy... or not

Did you complain about privacy issues recently on the internet? Read the following short little article. (link with more links)

A new flyer released by the Department of Justice and the FBI, emblazoned with the logos of each agency and being circulated to Internet cafes and other businesses, warns of “potential indicators of terrorist activities.”

In particular, the flyer cautions businesses to be on the lookout for “content of extreme/radical nature” as well as people who visit an Internet cafe even though there is evidence they have Internet access at home. It also urges people to watch for anyone using “anonymizers, portals, or other means to shield IP address,” or who seems “overly concerned about privacy.”

What’s more, the flyer urges people to be suspicious of those who “always pay cash” and to “identify license plates, vehicle description, names used, languages spoken, ethnicity, etc.”

The flyer concedes near the bottom that “some of the activities, taken individually, could be innocent and must be examined by law enforcement professionals.” Presumably, paying cash isn’t 100% proof that someone is a terrorist, but you’d better note their license plate and ethnicity, just in case.

That's right. If you see anybody paying cash, turn them in to the feds. Soon kids will learn to spy on their parents. (Where did I read about that before?) If you have any grandparents that fought in WWII, turn them in. After all, they were fighting for this freedom BS.

Put a stop to suspicious activities now! Do like I'm going to do. Go hide in the bushes and be on the look out for people being suspicious.

 

1790 - Super bowl antics

Has everyone been hearing about the 'finger' at the super bowl? I went to the tube and found the video of the half time show. You have to look at it close or you'll miss it. How people saw this is beyond me. It's more obvious that she says 'shit' during the song.

Here's the frame of the act.

Here's the whole video. The above happens at the 7:54 mark. Look quick or you'll miss it.




********

I've noticed spam starting to show up in comments again. If you click on the name in the comment it should take you back to the offenders blog id page. You can then copy the URL and report it here - http://support.google.com/blogger/bin/request.py?hl=en&contact_type=spam&rd=1


 

1784 - Pets

Just when you think things can't get any crazier, well I guess things can ALWAYS get crazier.

Going to try and adopt a pet from an animal rescue group? Get ready for the 3rd degree. And the 4th and 5th also. Seems like to adopt a pet from a rescue group now requires some bizarre hoop jumping.

From the article...

Being an animal rescuer can be a potent source of identity, combining salvation and self-sacrifice. But in recent years the ASPCA has seen that, for some people, this identity crosses over into pathology. Dr. Randall Lockwood, a senior vice president of the ASPCA, says that around 25 percent of the 6,000 animal hoarding cases reported in the United States each year involve purported rescuers, up from less than five percent 20 years ago.

The article also talks about a new trend. You don't actually own the pet. The rescue group retains ownership and can make an unannounced visit at any time (sometimes years after) and reclaim the pet if they don't like how you are providing for your... their pet.

The article goes into a lot more shenanigans these rescue groups are pulling. Read it HERE.

 

1780 - BOMB!!!!!

The headline says - FBI Wants to Monitor Social Media for 'Emerging Threats'

The following is from the article.

It's an idea that's not going to go away no matter how bad an idea it is. I'd be very careful about saying 'That show last night was the bomb,'" Condry says.

According to an FBI spokesman, words that would trip off the proposed system could include "lockdown, bomb, suspicious package, white powder, active shoot."

Seriously? Don't type bomb in your posts no matter what the connotation? I guess the 'emerging threats' would be anybody that wasn't going to vote for a conspiracy theory republican. Gotta keep those funds coming in.

I hope this is just a news outlet money making scare tactic headline.

 

1777 - Crack kills... or at least makes you stupid.

OK I'm going to dump another newspaper story on you. But this one is a little different. This is straight out of a TV crime show scenario. At least the way the story's written. I wouldn't be surprised if some crime show didn't pick this up. But there's also a lesson in here for the guys.


A convict with a conscience helped the feds unravel a murder-for-hire plot that involved a carjacking and electrocution by cat, according to federal court records. It also included the suspect's ex-stripper wife being used as bait.

Brett L. Nash, 45, of 43 Shirlwin Drive in Granite City, was arraigned in federal court Tuesday on charges of interference of commerce by threats of violence. Charges unsealed Wednesday state he recruited an unidentified friend to "help in robbing an old man" who Nash intended to lure with his wife, carjack, hold hostage while the victim wrote checks and then murder. Nash planned to put the victim in a Jacuzzi and electrocute him by throwing in a radio, court records state. They planned to obtain a cat, cat food and kitty litter for the house and then toss the cat in the water to make it appear the cat knocked in the radio.

The plot came apart when Nash's unnamed friend told FBI agent Nick Manns that "he did not want the intended victim killed." The friend was previously convicted of second-degree murder and sexual assault. "He told me he had straightened out his life, believed in God and could not live with himself if someone were murdered and he had not done anything about it," Manns states in the affidavit accompanying the federal charges. The document also states the friend was worried that Nash was setting him up.

Here's how the court records lay out Nash's plan. The victim and would-be accomplice are never named.

Nash approached his friend Jan. 9 with the plot. He told his friend that the person he was going to rob "liked women who were crack heads" and his wife knew him through her crack-head friend. Nash described his wife as a cross between Angelina Jolie and a Barbie doll and said the victim wanted to have sex with her.

Nash said his wife knew the intended victim had about $250,000 and that she could get him a key to the victim's house. Nash wanted his friend's help to carjack the victim while Nash's wife was in the car so police would not suspect she was involved in the criminal activity with Nash.

After carjacking the intended victim, Nash's plan was to take the victim back to the victim's house where Nash would hold him hostage for up to two weeks. During that time Nash would have the victim write out checks, including $5,000 to the accomplice for "labor" and $65,000 so the wife could buy her house out of foreclosure.

He also talked about strapping a bomb to the victim to force him to withdraw money from the Bank of Edwardsville. He planned to use an idea he'd seen on television, rigging up a collar and a Bluetooth device so Nash could hear the victim's conversation with the teller. Nash planned to kill the victim after he had gotten all of his money by putting the victim in his Jacuzzi and tossing in the radio, adding the cat.

Nash also discussed an alternate plot that included stabbing a teen-aged blond girl who lived with the victim. They would extort money by putting the victim in a chair with a hood, dripping chicken blood on him and then putting the victim's bloody fingerprint on a kitchen knife. They would threaten to stab the teen and call police to let the victim explain how his fingerprint got on the knife unless the victim paid them.

Nash told his friend that he had been to the victim's house and had been planning the murder for about a year, the affidavit said. In addition to the $5,000 check from the victim, Nash was promising the accomplice half of the take from the extortion.


OK, as you read this could you see how many places this well laid out plot could go wrong? If I ever do a post about the crime I'm about to commit, remind me how everyone on the TV shows gets caught.

 

1727 - Two booms

My friend Frank has been sending a few things to me. This first one was called an Italian Chritmas. I sort of figured it out before the end but it's still funny. (50 seconds long)




The second one was about junk from China.

Beware Chinese ammo - 44 Magnum Accident

First it was baby formula, then pet food, but now you should Watch out when buying anything from China, including bright, shiny ammunition.

A guy came into the police department the other day to ask a favor. He had a S&W 629 (.44 Mag) that he wanted to dispose of after a mishap at the range.

He said there was a loud bang when he tested his new ammo (Chinese made), and the gun smacked him in the forehead, leaving a nice gash.

Finally, something worthwhile from China.

 

1725 - OW OW OW

OK here's the headline.

Woman accused of trying to cut off husband's penis (with scissors)

They have been married for 32 years. The police said a 'long standing dispute' was the cause. I wonder what 'long standing disputes' name is. Because this seems like a specific kind of punishment.

They also said she used not ordinary scissors but 'poultry shears'.

Here's some of the description...

micro-serrated blade .... curved, tapered blades allow access to hard to reach places .... soft grip handle prevents hand strain.

Well even with all this help she couldn't manage to complete the deed. Being 69 she should have gotten the senior assist model.

 

1716 - Twits

Company Policy: 'We are not hiring until Obama is gone'

That's what some dumb ass Georgia company owner (U.S. Crane, LLC) put on his trucks. I think this is carrying the hate thing a little to far. What's next. The Dems saying 'If a republican gets elected we're going to quit buying stuff'.

The real problem is the haters are a more committed bunch. There's nothing like hate to make you attack someone with no thought of the consequences.

What this moron (or as the haters spell it 'moran') company owner didn't anticipate was the reaction, of both sides. The haters besieging his phones and website to congratulate him and the left to chastise him. He had to change his phone number and shut down his website. Congratulations dumb shit, how's your business now?

VIDEO from Georgia.

St. Louis TV article.
ABC news story.

The link to his website.


 

1710 - Bigots abound

Not Always Right seems to have come up with more than it's quota of bigots recently. I found four shake your head customer experiences.

********

A War Unwon
Mall | Sacramento, CA, USA |
(I am on leave and meeting an old friend in a restaurant inside a mall. Since I don’t know the area, I get there early and decide to window-shop beforehand. An old guy in his 80s approaches me.)

Customer: “I remember the good days when I didn’t have to see many of you orientals. Now, you’re everywhere stealing our jobs. All you do is get in the way and take from my great country.”

Me: “Sir, I’m a Marine. I’ve been in Afghanistan on multiple tours for the last three years. I serve OUR great country.”

Customer: “Oh! That’s good. Better you than losing some American boys.”

(I think about how the Marines trained me to survive everything an enemy can throw at us, but not how to listen to an old racist white man.)



Takes One To Jim Crow One
Video Rental Store | San Jose, CA, USA |
(I work at a movie rental store. Sometimes we have deaf customers. I know some conversational ASL and can usually communicate with the deaf community just fine. A woman and her daughter walk up with a note and place it on the counter and point to it repeatedly.)

Note: “We’re looking for two movies that came out last Tuesday.”

Me: *in ASL* “Hello, yes, what movies?”

Customer, to daughter: “Why does he think I’m deaf?”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry! Usually our deaf customers write notes to us.”

Customer: “That’s ridiculous! How dare you just assume I’m disabled! It’s ridiculous!”

Me: “I’m terribly sorry. May I ask why you gave me a note instead of asking me verbally?”

Customer: “You’re Asian! How was I supposed to know you knew my language?!”



Fahrenheit 2011
Bookstore | New York, USA | Bookstore
Customer: “That boy is sitting at the corner over there reading your book!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. Is he bothering you in any way?”

Customer: “No, but he is reading a book that he has not paid for yet. He’s like, almost halfway done!”

Me: “That’s okay, ma’am. We allow our customers to come and read our books here.”

Customer: “Why the h*** do you let people do that?”

Me: “Well, sometimes people want to see if they like how the book is written before spending money on it.”

Customer: “Yeah? Well, poor people shouldn’t be allowed to read!”



Bigot Bait
Retail | Burleson, TX, USA | Top
(I am helping a customer when a red-faced older man walks up and slaps the counter.)

Customer: “Why does [store] have illegals working here?! This is America!”

Me: “Sir, I’m not sure what you’re talking about. If you can just calm down–”

Customer: “Don’t you tell me to calm down! I fought for this country! I didn’t fight so that a bunch Mexicans could take over our country. You need to have someone here who speaks English in [department]!”

Me: “Sir, your language and comments are offensive to me, and I would like you to not speak to me again. I will be happy to get a manager for you, though.”

Customer: “F***ing Mexican lover!”

Customer, to his companion: “Let’s get out of here! Now!”

(I walk over to the department he was referencing. However, the only person there is a customer who just happens to be wearing something similar to our uniform. She smiles at me and says, in perfect English, “I really pissed him off, didn’t I?”)

 

1695 - Grease

Greasy foods. Yum.

But what to do with the left over grease? Why you sell it to the rendering company. That is if you can hold on to it. Grease is slippery right? It can slip right out of your grasp and into the hands of .... thieves! That's right. The crazies are now stealing .... GREASE!

It seems that the price of used grease has gone up enough that it is now in the sites of grease thieves. Here's a story about how a few of them got caught. I think they're from Arkansas. (That figures doesn't it?)

 

1686 - What? The sequel

Rams win! WHAT?!