1813 - Fixed

Sometimes the idiots are funny. Not very often and you have to clean up their stuff but sometimes it's worth it.

The email started out - This is straight forward country thinking...
Jeff Foxworthy on Muslims. Well, no it's not. Jeff Foxworthy wouldn't risk his career doing something this dumb.

I changed one word in every bit. Guess which one.

1. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to liquor.
You may be a Terrorist.

2. You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.
You may be a Terrorist.

3. You have more wives than teeth.
You may be a Terrorist.

4. You wipe your butt with your bare hand, but consider bacon unclean.
You may be a Terrorist.

5. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.
You may be a Terrorist.

6. You can't think of anyone you haven't declared Jihad against.
You may be a Terrorist.

7. You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.
You may be a Terrorist.

8. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.
You may be a Terrorist.

9. You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least four.
You may be a Terrorist.

Funny eh? Now came the ending - You Have a Nice Day Now...You Hear? WHAT? 'You have?' 'You hear?' Somebody doesn't have a clue about how Jeff talks. And I thought, check the internet. Maybe.... well no maybe about it. Here's the real list from 'You know you're a Taliban if...'

You refine heroin for a living, but you have a moral objection to beer.

You own a $3,000 machine gun and $5,000 rocket launcher, but you can't afford shoes.

You have more wives than teeth.

You wipe your butt with your bare left hand, but consider bacon 'unclean.'

You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.

You can't think of anyone you HAVEN'T declared Jihad against.

You consider television dangerous, but routinely carry explosives in your clothing.

You were amazed to discover that cell phones have uses other than setting off roadside bombs.

You've often uttered the phrase, 'I love what you've done with your cave.'

You have nothing against women and think every man should own at least one.

You bathe at least monthly whether necessary or not.

You've ever had a crush on your neighbor's goat.