How do you tell the difference between an Australian Police Officer, a Canadian Police Officer, an American Police Officer, and a Scottish police officer?
QUESTION:
You’re a policeman, on duty by yourself.
You are walking on a deserted street late at night.
Suddenly, an armed man with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you and screaming something that sounds like obscenities, raises the knife, and lunges at you.
You are carrying your truncheon (A large stick) or a gun, and are an expert in using it.
However, you have only a split second to react before he reaches you. What do you do?
ANSWERS:
Canadian Police Officer:
Firstly, the Officer must consider the man's human rights.
1) Does the man look poor and/or oppressed?
2) Is he newly arrived in this country and does not yet understand the law?
3) Is this really a knife or a ceremonial dagger?
4) Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
5) Am I dressed provocatively?
6) Could I run away?
7) Could I possibly swing my truncheon and knock the knife out of his hand?
8) Should I try and negotiate with him to discuss his wrongdoings?
9) Why am I carrying a truncheon anyway and what kind of message does this send to society?
10) Does he definitely want to kill me or would he be content just to wound me?
11) If I were to grab his knees and hold on, would he still want to stab and kill me?
12) If I raise my truncheon and he turns and runs away, do I get blamed if he falls over, knocks his head, and kills himself?
13) If I hurt him and lose the subsequent court case, does he have the opportunity to sue me, cost me my job, my credibility, and the loss of my family home?
Australian Police Officer:
BANG!
American Police Officer:
BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG !
'Click'...Reload...
BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG ! BANG !
Glasgow Police Officer:
"Haw, Jimmie!
Drop the wee knifie reet this minute noo, unless ye want it stuck up yer bum!"
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17 comments:
Sigh.
Though the police shooting anyone here is rare.
Sue - I'm sure it's a much lower rate than the US.
Much, much lower. For which I am grateful. Our other shooting deaths are also lower. More gratitude.
You have made a factual error ... an American police officer would fire off at least three clips before calling for backup. The backup would fire at least two more.
Bill - Blogger would only let me bang just so many times.
If the Canadian officer took action he'd apologise as well 🤣
I've never been to Australia or Scotland, and only spent a week Canada, so I'll have to take your word for those. However, your description of the American officer is pretty spot-on.
CC - Probably the first thing. I should have added that.
Kathy - Unfortunately yes.
Lol….liked it
John - That's a good thing!
Excellent!
The crazy guy wouldn't need a knife. Just running toward the American policeman would have been enough.
Ukn - Thanks!
Kirk - That's the sad truth.
I predicted something like that...
Mark - What would the Caymen police do?
! Thanks Mike
Cloudia - ด้วยความยินดี
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