Sunday, May 19, 2024

6225 - Long joke Sunday

An inventor organizes a meeting with a large technology firm to demonstrate his latest creation in the hopes of getting it onto the market.

Alone in a room with the CEO, he says to her, "I'd like you to meet Servobot 1999," and gestures to the door.

A boxy, roughly humanoid-shaped contraption wobbles into the room on clunky actuated legs. It has a big monitor for a face on which some poorly scribbled features have been defined.

The CEO looks disappointed. "What does it do?" She asks.

"Anything and everything," the scientist replies, excited. "Servobot," he says to the robot, "Organise the CEO's filing cabinet."

"YES, DADDY," Servobot replies and immediately sets to work organizing a cabinet in the corner.

His arms move so fast the CEO can't even see them. In a matter of moments, the clutter has vanished and every file is alphabetized and color-coded.

"Amazing!" Says the CEO.

"You haven't seen the half of it," replies the inventor. "Servobot, using whatever is available in this room, make the CEO a meal."

"YES, DADDY," Servobot replies and in the blink of an eye, Servobot is strategically flitting from one corner to the next, trimming cut-offs from plants, shaving leather off books, picking things out of the carpet. Once he's collected a handful of garbage, an opening reveals itself in his chest and he places the garbage inside. Dazzling light illuminates every corner of the room and Servobot starts whirring loudly as he states, "COMMENCING RECONSTITUTION OF ATOMIC STRUCTURES. LOADING. LOADING. BON APETITE."

As if by magic the garbage has disappeared. In its place is a perfectly cooked and succulent-looking roast chicken.

"Try it," Says the inventor.

The CEO does and it's the most delicious meat she's ever experienced. "Absolutely incredible. But I have to ask, why does it call you 'Daddy'?"

"Ah. That." Says the inventor. "Well, obviously Servobot 1999 is a leap in technology the likes of which has never been seen. It is a process that has taken me decades."

As the inventor is speaking, Servobot turns away from the CEO and presents to her his metallic behind. "SPANK ME, MOMMY," it says to the CEO

The inventor continues, apologetically. "But there are still some kinks to work out."


Elephant's Child said...

And those kinks would no doubt appeal to a particular market.

River said...

What EC said. I'd prefer not to have a robot do my organising and cooking. I'm very particular with the organising part.

Mike said...

Sue - I'm it could be programmed to particular kinks.

River - I'm bad at organizing and cooking. I could use a bot for those.

Bilbo said...

I'll wait for the next update.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

Should have seen that gag a mile away!

Mike said...

Bill - What?! No whips and chains for you?

Deb - I didn't.

Cloudia said...

Kinks. Right 👍🏽

Mike said...

Cloudia - 👍