I was down at the Pub with my mate, and I was looking into my glass a bit glum, and my mate asked what was wrong, I said to him my wife had given me an ultimatum, that if I came home drunk again she would leave me.
He looked me dead in the eyes and said all you need to do is when you get home creep upstairs to the bedroom, quietly get under the covers and start licking her pussy, she'll love you for it and forget to be angry with you, I promise it works!
I said fucking hell why not I'll give it a go!
So I got completely sozzled and when it was kicking out time I started to stumble home and eventually got to the front door and realized she was going to be angry, and I quickly remembered what my mate said I should do.
So I crept through the door all quiet and sneaked upstairs to the bedroom, got under the covers, and started to lick like my life depended on it.
I went for nearly 3/4 of an hour and she didn't move or even make a peep. Not a sound.
I got out of bed and went to the bathroom for a pee. And at that moment my wife walked in behind me with a judging look on her face and said,
"Oh, you are home then? Make sure you are quiet, mother is in our bed."
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13 comments:
I hope he regrets getting drunk.
Sue - There's going to be a deep secret in the family.
I expected the punch line, but it's still a good joke.
Yikes!
Yikes! LoL
Oops!
Well I have no words.
Bill - I'm sure this is an old joke.
Deb, Cloudia, Kathy, Lady - 3/4 of an hour got everyone's attention, didn't it?
I wonder if this will improve or hurt relations with his mother-in-law.
Did you hear my jaw hit the table when I read the punchline?
I hope he remembers that next time he's at the pub.
Kirk - After 45 minutes I would say improve.
River - I think they will both remember it forever.
This is too funny, naughty, inappropriate, and I loved it.
Susan - Yes, yes, yes, and alright!
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