The Presbyterian church called a meeting to decide what to do about their squirrel infestation.
After much prayer and consideration, they concluded that the squirrels were predestined to be there, and they should not interfere with God’s divine will.
At the Baptist church, the squirrels had taken an interest in the baptistry.
The deacons met and decided to put a water-slide on the baptistry and let the squirrels drown themselves.
The squirrels liked the slide and, unfortunately, knew instinctively how to swim, so twice as many squirrels showed up the following week.
The Lutheran church decided that they were not in a position to harm any of God’s creatures. So, they humanely trapped their squirrels and set them free near the Baptist church.
Two weeks later, the squirrels were back when the Baptists took down the water slide.
The Episcopalians tried a much more unique path by setting out pans of whiskey around their church in an effort to kill the squirrels with alcohol poisoning.
They sadly learned how much damage a band of drunk squirrels can do.
But the Catholic church came up with a more creative strategy!
They baptized all the squirrels and made them members of the church. Now they only see them at Christmas and Easter.
Not much was heard from the Jewish synagogue.
They took the first squirrel and circumcised him. They haven’t seen a squirrel since.
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15 comments:
I like it when I first read it, and I like it still.
I think the Catholic priests would have molested the squirrels.
Sue - Score a Sunday joke for you!
Infidel753 - More than likely, but that would have minimized the circumcision and killed the joke. :) Surely they're not still doing that... are they? HA!
Yeah, Infidel753 was probably right.
It's hard to get rid of squirrels when all of the Christian churches are full of nuts!
I thought this joke was good and then I read John A. Hill's comment! Hahahahahaha!
This is really funny!! And John's comment it even funnier!!
I did not think Lutheran ideology was big on not harming God's Creature. That should read the Buddhist Temple.
Bill - Sad but true.
John - Nice john. REALLY nice. That should be a secondary punch line to the joke!
Deb - Score one for John.
Allen - Score two for John.
Lady M - True but Christians picking on Christians works too.
John - Really good John.
John - Really really good John.
Shamelessly piggybacking on what John said, Could it be that you only see the squirrels on Christmas and Easter BECAUSE the priests molested them?
I thought the Catholics was the punchline 😝
That's hilarious!
Kirk - Another twist to think about.
Cloudia - There's actually six punch lines in that joke. John added a seventh.
Dawn - And I didn't have to find this one. Sue sent it to me.
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