Sunday, March 26, 2023

5832 - Long joke Sunday

An old joke that is still relevant today.

Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump. I said, "Don't do it!" He said, "Nobody loves me." I said, "God loves you. Do you believe in God?"

He said, "Yes." 
I said, "Are you a Christian or a Jew?" 
He said, "A Christian." 
I said, "Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?" 
He said, "Protestant." 
I said, "Me, too! What franchise?" 
He said, "Baptist." 
I said, "Me, too! 
Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?" 
He said, "Northern Baptist." 
I said, "Me, too! 
Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?"
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist." 
I said, "Me, too! 
Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?" He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region." 
I said, "Me, too!"
Northern Conservative†Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?" 
He said, "Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912." 
I said, "Die, heretic!" And I pushed him over.


Elephant's Child said...

Ouch. Religion so often IS divisive.

Bilbo said...

This ought to be a lot funnier than it is.

Debra She Who Seeks said...

That's about the size of it!

Mike said...

Sue - Too often.

Bill - Wouldn't that be nice?

Deb - The size of small minds.

John A Hill said...

Too lifelike to be funny

Mike said...

John - Sorry you had to live it.

Kathy G said...

Sadly still relevant. Probably always will be.

Mike said...

Kathy - Sad but true.

Leanna said...

That was funny.
Hey, I came in to answer your question about Freedom From Religion Foundation. Yes, I have seen their commercials and I happen to be a proud member.

Mike said...

Leanna - Interesting. This puts me one step closer to signing up.

River said...

I wasn't expecting that last line!
I thought perhaps he'd step down and they'd wander away for a beer chatting about how much they had in common.

Mike said...

River - The joke could be about Sunni and Shia but it would be a lot shorter.

Chief Squirrel said...

Please give credit to Emo Phillips for this one...

Mike said...

CS - I'd never heard of Emo Philips before. Turns out he's been around a long time. And thanks for the hint to a lot of new jokes. And who are you? Your website is missing. Change your blogger profile.

What CS is talking about...

Lady M said...

Ha ha - clever.

Mike said...

Lady - And true.