A virus? What kind? The PC!!! kind. Get your minds out of the gutter.
A friend called and said his PC caught a cold. His daughters' boy friend techy guy was going to come over and reload XP but hadn't had time to. I said I'd come over and take a look. After all, what the hell else do I have to do being retired and all? So I go to Bob's house. He says is this going to take long? BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Have a seat Bob.

So what's he got? The 'antivir' virus. This is one that pops up on your screen and says - You have a virus. Click here and we'll fix it. Somebody clicked here and then the fun began. When this thing takes over your machine it won't let any window stay open. You can see a window pop up but it's gone just as fast. Even Task Manager won't stay open.
So over the course of time I'm trying all sorts of things to beat this. Antivir keeps popping up asking do you want to buy it so it can fix the problem. If you click yes, IE will come up but it takes you only to the Antivir site and asks for your credit card. I'm not biting on that.
So it's boot, reboot, boot, reboot, (WAKE UP BOB!!!) boot, reboot .... looking for a way in. Finally I'm thinking what if I can open task manager BEFORE antivir loads? So I reboot and start hitting ctl alt del as XP is loading. Up pops task manager and it stays up!! Ah HA! Now I have access to the processes and can shut things down.
I see a svchost that seems to be running to much and zap it. There was also a file name that didn't look familure so I zapped it too. I click on IE and TADA! It's open. Now all it takes is downloading a shareware antivir zapper and a good copy of AVG and he's back in business. Nothing missing or messed up on his hard drive.
Bob's talking about buying a new computer. One of those Mac thingys. We know how reliable those are don't we
Bilbo? But I'm glad Macs are around. It keeps PC prices lower.